THE VEGETARIAN EATS BACON!

Among other reasons why I hung my head in shame today, I had my lowest of all low vegetarian moments. I NEEDED BACON, nothing was stopping me. So I walked into the cafeteria (slinked over so nobody saw me) and nervously asked for egg whites and cheese with a side of bacon. When the cook started putting a handful of well done bacon into my carton he asked why I had a horrified look on my face. I was like "DUDE THAT'S SO MUCH BACON!" He's like "um yeah, you ordered it" and I was like "BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE ORDERING THIS RIGHT NOW!!!!!" I guess I didn't realize how BONKERS that sounded to some random guy, but as an 8 year veggie (ok whatever I eat chicken fingers when I'm drunk or PMSing. BUT STILL.

Childbirth Class & Nursery Purchases!

Big weekend for our household! Mom and Dad attended an 8 hour childbirth class. They showed us a natural birth right before the lunch break - lovely! We got to hang out with some other couples who are expecting, which is cool. We learned all about what will happen when we get there, the labor process and what terms we should know. Nobody passed out, which is great! We also bought a crib this weekend, yahoo! It's exciting to start getting the nursery planned. Best part is, hubby isn't even fighting it! He's super involved which is awesome!

PRINCESS KATE

Could it be more rude that she doesn't even look like she gave birth?!!?!? Girlfriend walks out of the hospital like 24 hours later and looks all refreshed and beautiful and motherly. Did she eat a burrito?

Week 26! I'm a Bitch!

It's week 26 and I'm a complete bitch. My hormones are raging and everyone is frustrated with me and thinks I'm being mean. It's hard to control my emotions and I'm not handling myself well. I'm sorry if I'm a complete asshole to you. It's unintentional. In other news, the baby is the size of a head of iceberg lettuce!

105 DEGREE HEAT INDEX

I have never felt this repulsive in my entire life. Yesterday I was informed that my "whale tail" left sweat marks on my dress and was told to air dry it. Whale Tail, if you're not familiar, is the thong outline. It's mother effing hot. And not just because I'm pregnant. It's because it's mother effing hot. Like really hot. Like if I wanted this heat I'd move to Nevada. And it's not even enjoyable like Mexico where I can slip my toes in the pool. No, there's a commute and a full day of work involved. Repulsive. I want pool day.

LAST NIGHT'S DINNER = SRIRACHA MAC N CHEESE. NUFF SAID.

25 WEEKS!!!!!