WARNING: TOTAL BITCHFEST.

A few days shy of 19 weeks it's finally legit. I threw five pairs of jeans at the wall, none of which fit, and my leggings show a FUPA like you wouldn't believe. I'm officially showing. I pee every ten minutes, like clockwork and I feel our little gymnast or hockey player everytime I eat. It's like YO MA WATTUP FEED ME. Ok, that was more like a ghetto version of the plant from Little Shop of Horrors. I think we're over Oreos for the moment, and now we're onto tart things like super sour juices and lemon bars. I swear, food cravings are so ADHD, one night it's eggs for dinner the next night I'm smelling Chinese food everywhere I turn. Most recently I've become one with my inner beast. Raging hormones made me almost pop my dogs head off last night for barking for over three hours straight. Not hormones like I watched The Notebook five times and I cry until my face is swollen, raging hormones like Angelina Jolie style. Ass kicking murderfest. I should probably call my doctor. I swear I won't harm anyone during the making of this blog, but I have a new desire to listen to Rage Against the Machine. In addition to everything I've been bitching about, it's 90 degrees in NYC, which is offensively rude. Trying to sleep in a bra while your big tots are sweating is not sexy. I literally stripped down nude last night and felt the call of the ocean. I legit felt like a sea lion tanning on a rock. I quickly put my clothes back on (so sorry for the visual!) With that being said, it's pretty awesome that people are starting to recognize the belly. Occasionally, someone gets handy and reaches towards the belly without asking, but I don't mind. I've been dreaming about this my whole life. My coworkers are making me retire my heels soon, which is a huge issue for me. I'm just shy of 5'1'' and without my espadrilles and platform shoes I literally look 16 and pregnant. I'm already riding low to the ground so wearing heels is allowing me to hold on to dear life for my last remains of sexiness. Three days til our big sonogram where we COULD find out the sex, and count all those fingers and toes. SO COOL.